You Know You're in Texas - the full, illustrated edition

1. The SUV is the economy car
2.  A fellow librarian is referred to as "the sweetest piece of sunshine"
3. Storefront signs inform you that the unlicensed possession of a gun is against the law. (But guns in general are just fine.)
4. There is Tequila in the Sangria
5. No one knows that the bus actually does run from your hotel to the stockyard and they insist you must take a cab
6. There is a stockyard
7. The local bar (excuse me - honky tonk) has an indoor rodeo
8. The TV doesn't have PBS (and you can't watch the show on Whaling)
9. You just watched an Armadillo race - and the winner won a can of Armadillo milk
10. You're encouraged to "ride a horse, save a cowboy"
11. Fried okra is served at least once a day 
12. The enchiladas taste like heaven!